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How to Serve Others Who Are in Pain When We Don’t Even Know What to Say
Sarah Beckman is an author, blogger, speaker, and Certified Communications Coach. In this episode, she shared her amazing backstory and lessons that led to her book and speaking career. Just by listening to her talk, you can feel her incredible compassion and genuine care for others.
In a period of six years, she had a total of four back surgeries, that according to her, allowed her to be on the receiving end of other people’s kindness and help.
During her “decade of hardship”, she had to endure the pain of seeing several loved ones pass away as she pressed on with her own physical health issues.
The people in our lives don’t always have concrete, tangible roles assigned to them. – Sarah Beckman
At one point, people started reaching out to Sarah to ask her what to do for their friends who are going through a rough patch. Unbeknownst to her, she had been storing this treasure trove of knowledge.
People do not lack the compassion, they just lack the confidence to love other people well. – Sarah Beckman
When trying to be helpful to someone in deep emotional pain, ultimately, it’s not really about what we say. It’s more about not saying the wrong things. Sometimes we’re better off saying nothing. We just need to “show up” and be there (either physically or virtually) beside the person in need.
Most of the time, we just really need someone to show up. – Sarah Beckman
Sarah emphasized the point that we don’t get to put words into anyone’s mouth. We don’t get to put a silver lining in their situation. We don’t get to decide for them how they should feel. Instead, all we need to do is express our support.
It’s not your job to put a positive spin on the situation for them. – Sarah Beckman
Lighten the burden just a little bit. – Sarah Beckman, sharing her definition of “loving your neighbor”
What You’ll Learn
- The stories behind Sarah’s book and her drive to “help others help others”
- How she survived her “decade of hardship”
- How to serve others in pain when we don’t even know what to say
- How to take what you’re gifted at and offer to do that thing for the person you love
- Why we should avoid saying, “What can I do to help?” to someone in an emotionally-charged situation… and what to say instead
- A list of “true but unhelpful” words to avoid
Resources
- Alongside: A Practical Guide for Loving Your Neighbor in their Time of Trial by Sarah Beckman
- Sarah Beckman’s website
Bio
Sarah Beckman graduated from the University of Wisconsin-Madison with a Bachelor’s degree in Journalism/Advertising. While staying home with her kids, she was also a “professional volunteer” at her church for over 15 years. She’s led Women’s and Evangelism Ministries, Marriage classes, Bible studies, and church-wide programs.
Since 2007, Sarah has been pursuing her calling as a professional speaker. She speaks to audiences across the country sharing her passion for loving people well. Her topics including: loving your neighbor, sharing your faith, safeguarding your marriage and digging up your talents.
Sarah writes a blog at sarahbeckman.org, and has written her first book titled, Alongside:A Practical Guide for Loving Your Neighbor in their Time of Trial. (Releases February, 2017)
Sarah is also a Certified Communications Coach at the SCORRE™ Conference, where she relishes in continually improving her craft and teaching others to become more powerful and focused communicators.
Married to Craig over 24 years and a mother to 3 teenagers, Sarah currently resides in Albuquerque, NM. Her life is made richer with family, friends, coffee, sailing, hiking and travel.
